Today is my birthday. I didn't really think a lot about it until last night. Someone mentioned how old I become today as if it were a bad thing. I'm 39 so next year I'll hit 40. Maybe my thoughts will change in a year but I don't think that's a big deal even though a lot is said about people turning 40.
So I'm 39. What's that mean? I realized it meant I'm now the same age as Chopin, Jim Reeves and Dennis Wilson were when they died. Thomas "Stonewall" Jackson was my age when he died as were Amelia Earhart and Martin Luther King, Jr. Looking at it like that it makes one realize how much they accomplished and leaves you wondering about what you've accomplished. I think about my own dad when he was my age. In my mind he seemed like such a mature and responsible man. I can't help but think I'm still a kid acting stupid a lot of the time.
Obviously when you're a kid birthdays are a big deal; one of those days to really look forward to. I think the last birthday most people look forward to is when they turn 21. Naturally that's important because you're then an adult. Then at least for me, you go through a phase where it's not a big deal. Maybe it's different for different people. Maybe everyone looks forward to their birthday every year regardless of their age. I hadn't really thought about it until last night.
I thought about past birthdays; some of the days themselves but I thought more about the phases and stages of life. I remember moving to a different state on my 5th birthday. I had a birthday party when I turned 8. It seems like a big party in my mind. I received the complete set of "Little House on the Prairie" books that year from my parents. My oldest daughter has them now. I thought about the surprise parties my parents held for me when I turned 13 and 16. The last party held on a birthday for me was when I turned 21, also given to me by my parents.
My wife does a great job of making everyone in the family feel important on their birthdays. Today was no exception. I realized today that as kids we look forward to these days more for the presents than anything. 39 isn't a magical number but for some reason, for a lot of reasons this was a special day. This was a day I appreciate and will remember.
My oldest daughter is 11 now. She gave me a funny card. It seems made for me but it also shows her sharp humor at that age. I think (maybe hope) she got that humor from me. My youngest who is 3 thinks singing "Happy Birthday" is the coolest thing one can do on a person's birthday. She's serenaded me several times today. Someday, some year soon she won't think that's cool and she won't sing it to me; at least not with the same gusto and excitement as today. I'll remember this day.
My wife gave me a card that almost brought me to tears. What it said was almost as special as she is. I don't believe I deserve the sentiments it included but I know she meant it and it once again made me thankful to have her in my life. We went to lunch together. She took time away from her work to do that. She could have kept working so she'd get back home to our daughters sooner but she wanted to make the day special for me. Then we went shopping for pants for me and ended up buying a shirt and tie! I picked the shirt and she picked the tie and somehow I find that special that we both had a part to play in that combination. I'm sure I'll think of that when I wear them together.
My parents, two brothers and sister have called me today. They all call every year on this day as I call them and we all call each other on our birthdays. We may be separated by several states and spread out in different time zones but we always talk to each other frequently by phone. That's important I think, not just using email all the time but talking to each other.
What's the point to this? Maybe, just maybe this birthday means something to me because I'm getting to a point in life where I truly appreciate what I have. Maybe I cherish memories of the past more without worrying about the things that didn't work out as planned. I'm pretty sure I cherish the "now" more than ever. I realized something else today too. There's still a lot to look forward to.
There's something else I thought about too. I'll never compose music like Chopin or cut legendary records like Jim Reeves. I'll never be the legendary leader of men that Stonewall Jackson was. Who cares? The other side of the coin is what matters to me. They never were the oldest son of my parents or the older brother to my siblings. They weren't married to my wife and never had daughters as special as mine. I like where I'm sitting in life. Happy birthday to me.
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